From
the time #MeToo movement started, I have wondered, what if a family member of
mine was accused of sexually harassing a woman? What would be my position? How
would I react? Will I be able to speak in public about it? What will be the
repercussions in my life?
Well
I did not have to wonder too long. A newcomer actor who worked in my husband
Rajesh Touchriver’s under-production bi-lingual Odiya/telugu film ‘Patnagarh’, accused
him of ‘mental harassment’, ‘gender discrimination’ and making ‘sexist
remarks’. While the film is produced by Sridhar Martha and has three
co-producers Manoj Mishra, Atul Kulkarni and me, for reasons best known to this
aggrieved person she only mentions me apart from Rajesh Touchriver (she also
mentions another actor in the video). I
am sure she must be having a justifiable reason for mentioning me in the #MeToo
post & thereafter a video, even though I visited the location only twice while
the others were there throughout.
Since
I was fully aware of the day-today happenings on the sets and all the
challenges related to the production right from the start, at least in this
case I did not have any moral or ethical dilemma on what my position should be, I knew the complete truth!
But
is it distressing? Yes it is!
It is
distressing to see, colleagues in my sector posting the news article of this case with
statements such as ‘Living one’s
politics is tougher when one has to confront it at home, isn’t it?
It
was also distressing to see, people(who are not even friends on Fb with the
aggrieved person) who were given significant roles in Rajesh’s films sharing
the Fb post of the aggrieved person (now one was wondering what was this
person’s problem? when even after 1 year after the movie was produced she has
not mentioned anything, she has even joined two film festivals with us where
the movie was nominated)…you actually start becoming paranoid!
It
was painful to see friends feeling compelled to ‘lash out’ but unable to do so
for the fear of public perception.
It
was also very distressing to answer friends and relatives who were anguished to
see Rajesh’s name appearing in all kinds of shows on television including FIR
as an accused.
What
should be my position? If I speak, it will be ‘manipulation of victimhood’
(this is what one gentleman accused me of) and if I don’t it will be ‘ look at
her, she was so articulate about the #MeToo, now since it is her husband, she
is keeping quite’.
I
have been a great supporter of #MeToo movement, as I think it gave platform for
at least one class of women to speak up. But I was always of the opinion that
just #MeToo has no relevance(please refer to all my tweets in the last few
months). This
should be followed by #MeTooWillReport. In the absence of reporting it is just
an allegation…an accusation and sometimes it has the potential to be misused.
As
much as the aggrieved person has the right to dignity and justice, so does the
alleged person has the right to clear his name.
While
the rich & famous today may step down from a current position they are
holding under duress and pressure, the large number of #MeToo will continue at
homes/schools/colleges/offices/public places…for there is no deterrence...
Yes
when a near & dear one is accused ‘fairly or unfairly’ it hurts…and when
somebody uses it to settle scores it hurts even further…but the truth gives you
confidence and the trust gives you strength.
On my
part, I will continue to fight to ‘break the silence’, I will stand by the
‘truth’ and I will do everything under
the sun in my power to support the ‘genuine victims’.
We are with you
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteThe recent story in the Guardian is incredible and impossible to believe. I am terribly sad – and very angry – that you and your staff have ben forced to endure such malicious and ill-founded and slanderous “gossip”.
On our recent trip to Prajwala, I had limited opportunity to talk with survivors though I saw many. But I know from the three earlier trips I made with my business partner, Carol, that the reality is so different for survivors than your story. We have seen the joy and love that emanates from both the women and girls as a result of them being at Prajwala. We have spent days with survivors in training sessions and heard them actively participate as strong, courageous women, full of life and ready to return to the outside world. And indeed, some of them were already working jobs outside. While we did not work with the children, we felt the same about their responses to us. They were warm, loving, eager, full of life.
Sunitha has always told us there are women who resist the treatment and return to sex work. So that has never been a secret. But this story concocts a terrible story from a handful of disenchanted women who were in Prajwala centers.
I have also had the opportunity to work closely with the leaders of Prajwala. These are caring loving women and men. They are filled with the highest regard for the women and children in their care.
I have spent much of my professional life assessing individuals. So my comments above are based on my own professional expertise as well as the expertise of my business partner, Carol, and more recently the woman who accompanied me this year, Anjanette, who also has a PhD in this field.
I recommend you get better reporters.