After 25 years of work, I was under the arrogant presumption that I knew about sex crimes and sex trafficking.
My balloon burst a few weeks back, when the local police requested my support for recording the statement of a victim.
Nothing prepared me for the fact that victim before me was a 2 year old infant brutally raped by a neighbor. My hands were cold...my legs were shivering and my tongue was heavy....I could not get a word out. I recused myself and referred the case to a psychologist who did the needful. For the first time in my professional life my skills failed me.
While one copes with disbelief the ever growing numbers of women & children subjected to sexual assault, on the other hand I am disgusted with the extraordinary solidarity a convicted rapist gets in this country.
Two states in the country came to a standstill the day rapist Ram Rahim was convicted, 40 lives were lost,arson,roiting all for a rapist! This man had the patronage of the most powerful in the country.
I can understand nobody can predict anybody's character in advance. But atleast when a court direction is given, did these powerful people condemn the act...NO....did these people mention anywhere that they made mistake in supporting this man...NO....
Silence...eerie silence. I think this kind of silence in such moments is the critical factor that facilitates an enabling environment for impunity. We all do it in multiple ways.
Every time we find fault with a victim for her being raped and chose to exclude her, ostracize her, assassinate her character, her dressing, her behavior....we support a rapist.
Every time we choose not to report, as our family honor and prestige is far greater than the criminal violation of our daughter's body...we support a rapist
Every time we ignore the news reports of sex crime...and continue with our busy lives for we believe this can never happen to our children...we support a rapist
A few days back I was speaking at a conference and I was taken aback with the stunned silence (the sound of the applause was so feeble) I received from the audience after my speech. I wondered whether I lost my touch! The tea-break was shocking. Nearly 26 adult women in the audience of 2000 slowly came up to me at different points, and shared that they were raped as a child...and this is the first time that they were sharing to any human being. Some of them were past 40 years and were abused when they were 6-7yrs old. Decades of silence....decades of freedom & liberty for the perpetrator!
When are soul is silent...can we expect any change anywhere? If we have to break the silence, it has to start in each one of us...breaking the silence of our soul.
By 'liking' 'commenting' 'posting' or 're-sharing' we do not bring social change...maybe we just support a cause and express our solidarity. Real change happens...when 'we' change....our outlook changes.
The day we decide from the core of our being...any sexual violence on us or anybody else is absolutely 'intolerable' that is the day change will start...and maybe a day will come when the world will be safe for all of us!
(serious warning to those posting advertisements of escort services & porn sites on my blog, I have been silent and tolerant till now...don't expect me to be that always...you must know there are ways to report)
My balloon burst a few weeks back, when the local police requested my support for recording the statement of a victim.
Nothing prepared me for the fact that victim before me was a 2 year old infant brutally raped by a neighbor. My hands were cold...my legs were shivering and my tongue was heavy....I could not get a word out. I recused myself and referred the case to a psychologist who did the needful. For the first time in my professional life my skills failed me.
While one copes with disbelief the ever growing numbers of women & children subjected to sexual assault, on the other hand I am disgusted with the extraordinary solidarity a convicted rapist gets in this country.
Two states in the country came to a standstill the day rapist Ram Rahim was convicted, 40 lives were lost,arson,roiting all for a rapist! This man had the patronage of the most powerful in the country.
I can understand nobody can predict anybody's character in advance. But atleast when a court direction is given, did these powerful people condemn the act...NO....did these people mention anywhere that they made mistake in supporting this man...NO....
Silence...eerie silence. I think this kind of silence in such moments is the critical factor that facilitates an enabling environment for impunity. We all do it in multiple ways.
Every time we find fault with a victim for her being raped and chose to exclude her, ostracize her, assassinate her character, her dressing, her behavior....we support a rapist.
Every time we choose not to report, as our family honor and prestige is far greater than the criminal violation of our daughter's body...we support a rapist
Every time we ignore the news reports of sex crime...and continue with our busy lives for we believe this can never happen to our children...we support a rapist
A few days back I was speaking at a conference and I was taken aback with the stunned silence (the sound of the applause was so feeble) I received from the audience after my speech. I wondered whether I lost my touch! The tea-break was shocking. Nearly 26 adult women in the audience of 2000 slowly came up to me at different points, and shared that they were raped as a child...and this is the first time that they were sharing to any human being. Some of them were past 40 years and were abused when they were 6-7yrs old. Decades of silence....decades of freedom & liberty for the perpetrator!
When are soul is silent...can we expect any change anywhere? If we have to break the silence, it has to start in each one of us...breaking the silence of our soul.
By 'liking' 'commenting' 'posting' or 're-sharing' we do not bring social change...maybe we just support a cause and express our solidarity. Real change happens...when 'we' change....our outlook changes.
The day we decide from the core of our being...any sexual violence on us or anybody else is absolutely 'intolerable' that is the day change will start...and maybe a day will come when the world will be safe for all of us!
(serious warning to those posting advertisements of escort services & porn sites on my blog, I have been silent and tolerant till now...don't expect me to be that always...you must know there are ways to report)
